“I WILL NEVER BE A COWBOY” by Katrina Agbayani

TV announcer says let’s be horrified and
watch these spitting men in pretty costumes
test how long they can ride out a crazed
animal. trophies for whoever can prove that
I am a COWBOY that I DOMINATE the
crazed animal with a mouth full of shiny
teeth, meat-eating teeth, gatorade and
premature dentured teeth that reflect the
stage lights like the sullen calf reflects the
dark belly of desire: not everything pretty
can be spared. start the pageant. roll the
cameras. make fury look like a hobby like
it’s not something to be ground into —I
want to kiss the unhinged jaw of the crazed
animal and promise that I could never be a
cowboy God won’t let me be a cowboy
look me in the eye and tell me I’m not my
own worst animal